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When you're in the early stages of a new relationship, everything is great. But sometimes, if you fast-track through the early relationship stages, things can get stale real fast. Taking it slow will mean something different to every person, and, similarly, the reason for pumping the brakes will change depending on the individual.
To decode what guys actually mean when they say they want to take things slow, I turned to Reddit and experts, and these are the most common explanations. Plus, if a guy wants to build on your emotional connection before getting into physical intimacy, it can be a that he takes that next step seriously.
In this case, taking it slow could be a way for him to protect the current relationship you have and the future relationship you might have. Relationships are complicated, so making sure all of the right feelings are there before diving in can help keep you grounded. A rushed relationship may not have the same depth as one with a slower start.
When you dive headfirst into something, you could be skipping crucial relationship milestones that build a deeper form of emotional intimacy. Plus, a relationship built entirely on sex is rarely as healthy or gratifying as one that fulfills both your emotional and physical needs.
It might be a lesson he learned from experience. Even without a complicated relationship history, taking things slow could just be a personal preference. If it suits both of you, taking your time could be totally worth the wait.
And although the two often go hand-in-hand, intense attraction, or infatuation, can often make it tricky to distinguish between having feelings for someone and simply wanting to sleep with them. According to the experts, they may be on to something. Infatuation often le to a relationship that moves relatively quickly. Deeper feelings like love are very different from infatuation. T hey require a more thorough knowledge of the other person, which takes time. Infatuation often factors into rushed relationships, and although being incredibly attracted to your partner does not sound like a bad thing, it can make it more difficult to spot potential problem areas.
The friend zone is not necessarily a bad thing; some of the best, long-term relationships are built on friendship.
And, according to Salkin, that can be one of the biggest pros of taking things slow with a new partner. Think of it like a long foreplay.
Another reason your man might want to move a bit slower? Everyone has their baggage, and a past rushed relationship could be affecting how they approach dating now.
BTW, this is generally a good thing; you want someone who learns from their mistakes. The pace of your relationship matters, and although you may crave a whirlwind romance that could fit into a 2 hour rom-com, the truth is that there is no rush when it comes to love. Taking the time to build a steady foundation of trust and emotional intimacy before rushing into a full-blown relationship could pay off in the end.
That way, when the honeymoon stage ends, you still have a bond connecting you. So, take a deep breath. Remember, slow and steady wins the race. Thomas Edwards Jr. Lori Salkinmatchmaker and dating coach. This article was originally published on By Sean Abrams and Hannah Kerns.
Updated: June 17, Originally Published: May 25, Search Close.Date and take it slow
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6 Legit Reasons Guys Want To Take Your Relationship Slowly